Friday, August 25, 2006

The Three S's

I think I could get used to going to work at 1PM. I mean if I can’t work from 8-4 like the rest of you stiffs then why not go in at 1PM. Although, on orders from Coach Hebe, I’ve been told to rest the next three days otherwise I’d be out there hammering away for 2-3hrs today.

I managed to talk The Legend into “allowing” me to ride yesterday under his supervision. Good ride. A little over 2hrs. Fast cadence but just a nice easy ride. A couple times Mike had to tell me to ease off. I make it sound like I’m down on The Legend for telling me to shut it down for a few days but, alas, there is a method to his madness. Serious bicycle training starts Monday and it would suit me well to be as fresh as possible. Makes sense. PowerTap combined with CyclingPeaks combined with excellent guidance from Hebe should turn me into a crank bending powerhouse. Or so the theory goes.

This morning I climbed the big-ass tree in our back yard to trim some branches. I forgot how much fun it is to climb a tree. Mission accomplished. I also dug up the mulch around the perimeter of the garage and spread some diatomaceous earth to hinder the little critters trying to eat the walls.

Now, it’s time to shit, shave, and shower then go take a nap at work.

Sunday, August 20, 2006

Mt. Kessel

There was a near eruption of Mount Kessel this afternoon. Thursday I went to the local grocery store and purchased all the fixins to whip up some guacamole. Main ingredient….avocado. All I could find in the entire produce section of this place was these silly “low-calorie” avocados. So I bought two. I get home, cut ‘em open and sure enough…..pure shit inside. Mount Kessel starts to rumble slightly. Things like this really piss me off.

Fast forward to Sunday afternoon. The Wifey makes another trip to same grocery joint to pick some things up. Three more avocados this time. Same “low-cal” fruit but much firmer. Same freakin result. They smell funky. They’re brownish inside. Pure shit. This is when Mount Kessel begins to really boil. 5 avocados in three days at a cost of approx $1.70 a piece. Now, mind you, I’m not looking to buy these stupid “low-cal” avocados. What I want is a real Haas avocado. None of this chemically altered bullshit. This time I took all three of todays fruits and bagged them and will be returning them tomorrow.

Unfortunately this didn’t solve my urge for guacamole. I had to drive in to the other local grocery store, which manages to piss me off far more often than not. Alas, they actually had the real deal. On sale too. Disaster narrowly averted. Mount Kessel has simmered down to safe levels once again.

On another note, I just watched El Tigre blow away another field of hacks. It reminded me of how much I love my athletes to be dominant. And I mean abso-freakin-lutly DOMINANT. I gave up golfing a couple years ago. Riding is more fun and less aggravating. But I still enjoy watching this dude crush people on the golf course. When he is on, no one can compete. In fact he is so good at his craft that he most often has his competition beaten before it even starts. The others are playing for second place. They are mentally beaten.

Which is why I was/am a Lance fan. Clean or not, I still loved the beat downs he administered for 7 years. Personally, I enjoyed watching USPS/Disco ride tempo at the front all day long, keep a couple climbers in reserve to blow off any pretenders, and then watch Lance pop Jan/Ivan/Tyler/Iban/Joseba/Andreas/Levi/whoever off his wheel. That never got old for me. It was fun to watch.

My love for dominance doesn’t really translate to team sports. Anyone who reads this knows it’s quite the opposite. I root for perpetual losers. The Phillies haven’t won dick since 1980. Raiders? 1984. Flyers? I was barely even able to read let alone be a fan of hockey. 1975. ‘Bama? That’s been my most recent taste of glory. 1993. But this doesn’t mean I want to see dominant teams fail. For example; college football. Teams like Notre Dame, Nebraska, Miami, Florida State, or Oklahoma should never suck. This rule does NOT apply to Penn State, who as far as I’m concerned should always suck. Baseball; I don’t like the Yankees but the reason people hate them so much is because they win. It wouldn’t be any fun to see a team like that suck. Maybe one year but not over a long period. Detroit Red Wings. Colorado Avalanche. New York Rangers. They should never suck. You get the picture.

Party at Holmes Cyclery this week. The Boss has gone sailing on the Chesapeake for a week. I need to find a nice comfortable spot in the basement to take a nap. Just kiddin’. We actually work twice as hard when Allen’s gone so that he might leave more often. At any rate, leave me alone this week. I need to catch up my zzzzz’s.


Another good week of riding. One more week of JRA and then the real fun begins. Coach Hebe takes over the week after. 4 weeks to Charm. Then four more to Granogue. Holy crap, that puts us nearly through October. Time flies when, well, I guess I’m having fun.

Speaking of parties. Last night was the Calvin & Amy fest. Calvin is The Wifey’s cousin. Anyway, imagine 200 people congregated on one 4-acre property, of which approx 10 I know, eating drinking dancing swimming smoking talking yelling screaming drinking and did I mention eating? I’m never disappointed in the food. I was especially pleased to see pork bbq and sloppy joe’s. I had one of each along with a several pasta/potato salad concoctions and a bevy of cookies and brownies. My favorite cookies were the HOMEMADE choco-chips. Yum!

A few months ago Erin bought a real nice used bedroom/crib set-up for little junior. I attempted to assembled the crib today and lost patience real quick. It’s great furniture but unfortunately zero directions were included. After 20 minutes of rising temper I gave up only to hear Erin say she forgot about the other parts hidden in the closet. Nice. I wasn’t about to resume at that point but lucky for me Erin’s dad came over for an unrelated reason. Somehow he got roped into putting the thing together. I heard him barking pretty good for an hour or so. I certainly would have been happy to try it again later but he managed to get it together. That works. Speaking of pregnant. 4 months to go. I also heard news that friends of ours are expecting, again. Congrats!

I’ve been working with Champ-Sys on getting some cycling clothing made for the coming ‘cross season. I sent them a bunch of logos and colors and yesterday I received some artwork to get an idea of what things will look like. Now I just need to get an order together. Nate, Kenny, KHam, Hebe. Anyone else?

I’m sleepy. Time for a nap.

Sunday, August 13, 2006


I got in another great ride today. This weather is magnificent. 57 miles in 3hrs. I didn’t want to stop but I was getting pretty hungry. I’m still not sure what or why I’ve felt so good riding this week. I started using a supplement (legal) last Saturday and felt a positive effect. Of course you’re never sure of the source of these good sensations. Is it the pill or mental? At any rate, due to my great rides I feel it’s my duty to tell absolutely no one what exactly it is I’m taking (legal).

Today I ran out of samples of said supplement but felt the best I’ve been all week. I did pump my Vittoria Diamante Pro tires up to approx 135 psi after running them at 120 psi all season long. These tires are rated to max at 145 psi but I’ve felt no need to pump them that high. Although I am black from the waist down I would certainly not consider myself a big person. 120 psi has done me just fine so far. It just seemed today for 3hrs it was practically effortless. Not much wind. Dry. Sunny. Not a cloud in the sky. I don’t think you could order a more perfect day if it were possible. As much of a whiner as I am about weather I don’t think anyone could complain today.

Nascar was actually a joy to watch today considering it was a road race up in Watkins Glen. I need to make it up there again. it's not that long of a drive to see a good event.

As much as I’d love to sit here and peck away so more on the keyboard I believe I here the hammock crying out my name. L8

Friday, August 11, 2006

Blowin in the Wind

Well, not really. The past few days I just can’t get the wind figured out. Despite what Mr Weather-loser might forecast, it seems like no matter what direction I ride I’m getting headwind. No big deal. Just one of those minor annoyances of being a bicycler. Plus it reminded me of some good Bob Dylan songs to sing along in my head while I ride.

I’ve been feeling good on my rides this week. Hopefully good things to come this fall. I signed up for Charm City about 7 weeks early to ensure me a good starting spot. I’m going to use that race as a “training race” so to speak. It’s a full 4 weeks before the MAC season starts. I’m going to race Charm with my PowerTap set up on my ‘crosser. As if training for ‘cross is some mystical creature where only using my PowerTap will unlock the secret to being fast. It will, I’m sure, provide a nice set of numbers to base further training off of. I look forward to it.

Yesterday The Wifey and I both had the day off so after I rode in the morning we cruised over to BassPro with Erin’s parents to use up my Xmas gift card. I hate shopping but I managed to spend a little time and pick out a nice shirt and shorts to match. Outside of being a bicycler I really can’t call myself much of an outdoorsman but that place is pretty friggin cool. I guess I’m more of a Circuit City/Best Buy indoorsman but BassPro is fun.

We then went over to City Island and played a round of mini golf. Erin led halfway but completely unraveled after I deftly knocked in a hole-in-one on the 11th. Game over. After that we stopped at a Chinese buffet and gorged ourselves. Erin ate about 7lbs of king crab legs. I took a little of just about everything offered which made for a Bluto-ish type dinner plate x 2. Yum. I typically don’t care for Chinese food. Maybe once a year I’ll get a hankerin for it.

Weather looks nice for the weekend. Maybe a trip to Haars for a good double feature?

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Further Adventures of KHam the Kitchen Cleaner

What does winning 4 consecutive MASS races get you at Holmes Cyclery? More respect and admiration than ever before. Way to go young Kyle!

KHam showing off his kitchen cleaning skills

Saturday, August 05, 2006

Hey Brutha

I’m whupped. A rare Saturday off, and a beautiful day at that. Erin had another teacher type thing today that sent her to Allentown for the day so I was on my own. I got out of bed at 6:45am to send her off then took another 45 minute nap. I then proceeded to make a mega waffle/granola/mango/banana/kiwi breakfast. That damn near sent me to another nap but I fought through it.

Around 11am I headed out for a long easy ride. Just what the doctor ordered. Awesome weather. 3hrs. 50+ miles. I was getting a little cramped towards the end. Afterall, it was almost 90 by the time I finished. I was famished. Before I chowed down I did a little weigh-in. 140.0lbs. Obviously I didn’t eat diddly-poo during the ride and the cramping is an obvious sign of not enough water. BUT, holy shit! I’m sure I haven’t weighed this little since I was a porn-stache growing 10th grader.

So, I had the remnants of the sushi Coach Hebe bribed me with in exchange for building a couple wheels for him. Good stuff. Thanks brutha. Of topic a bit. Speaking of “brutha”. I was riding in to work a few weeks ago and was stopped at the 17th street bridge in Camp Hill. As I’m waiting for the light to change I hear this loud-ass rumbling of a motorcycle rolling up in the lane to the right of me to make a right turn. The unmistakable driver crawls by me and waves a peace sign and says “hey brutha”. Just for good measure, as if I didn’t know who it was, he turns around after he’s well beyond me and says “ it’s me, Turk”. Priceless.

Back to my day. After sushi, a trip to the couch. I watch the Sillies blow a sure win against the Mets. Dumbasses. It was enough to get me off the couch and mow the lawn. It was on my do-list so I had to do it eventually anyway. Now I’m looking to hit the couch again. I think when The Wifey gets home tonight we’re going to head up to the Lions Club in Marysville (Home of Kuhn ‘Cross) to take in the town carnival. I’ve had a hankerin for funnel cake for a while now and I’m sure I’ll find some there. All this hinges on how my wonderful pregnant wife is feeling after her long day. We’ll see.

I feel I have to pimp my XM radio some more. I’ve been listening a lot lately to channel 150 which is one of the comedy channels. Basically they play 5 minute clips of stand-up comedy routines from pretty much any funny person who ever told a joke. This goes right along with my long-standing need to have someone on my radio talk to me. Whether it be talk radio, sports, or whatever. Don’t get me wrong, 80’s new wave is still great but I’m having a ball listening to this stuff.

I also found a channel that plays nothing but that death metal shit where the lead singer sings in that low guttural voice while the band kachunka-chunkas away. Right now there is some band playing a song called 'Pool of Stool' (read these lyrics! a freakin riot). That, my friends, is not something you'll find on just any radio. Love it. I’m pretty sure Erin hates it. How do they make their voices do that? I want to learn.

Good day.

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Further Adventures of KHam the Broom Handler

So, what does winning three consecutive MASS races, including winning the third on a borrowed single speed, get you at Holmes’ Cyclery. Well, much admiration and respect, of course.

KHam - Sweeping the sidewalk out front - Temp in shade-136 degrees

All due respect, young Kyle has a nice streak going although we’re not going to just roll over and take it easy on him. That wouldn’t do him or us any good, now would it?